Read MoreWe found out Heather was pregnant in December of 2015. As a first-time father, I can't even begin to tell you how that feels. Everything was off to a great start. Right around the time that the 2016 NBA Playoffs began, however, our pregnancy went off the tracks.
Read MoreI remember sitting in the chair enjoying kangaroo time with my daughter when rounds happened. They asked me “how does Monday sound?” and I naturally responded, “for what?” Poppy still had a feeding tube in at that point so I thought their response would be for that to be removed since everything seemed to happen in steps while we were in the NICU.
Read MoreFor moms who want to breastfeed, whether that be by pumping, nursing, or both, here are tips that I hope will be helpful during your nicu stay.
Read MoreAnd yet, the world kept going. Outside, the weather turned to summer, then to fall. In the time she was in the hospital, it snowed, rained, was in the high 90ºs, and the leaves began to turn. The Cavs won the Championship, almost an entire baseball season passed, and football season had started. Holidays- Cinco de Mayo, Mother’s Day, Memorial Day, Father’s Day, Independence Day, my birthday, Labor Day, our anniversary, all kept happening.
Read MoreFew have had their relationships tested like those who are parents to a child in the NICU. Even the strongest, most resilient marriage can be pushed to the breaking point when your child is fighting for their life. As a mother, you’re going through the hardest thing you’ve ever been through, you’re being tested to your limits every day- and your rock, your confident, the person you GO TO when you need to be supported is going through the same damn thing.
Read MoreThat thought haunts me a little bit to this day. If I had waited for a response from a forum, it would have been too late. If I said wait until the morning, it would have been too late. I am so happy I listened to my body and that I trusted myself. Trusting yourself carries you through your time in the NICU. Your baby sees several doctors, nurses, NPs, and therapists.
Read MoreAs they continue to grow older, most will forget their early start, but as parents this is something we will never forget. Being told to terminate Leo, praying for each week of continued pregnancy, and then the weeks that turned into months as we prayed for the boys to grow healthy and strong enough to bring home from the hospital.
Read MoreIt is also the best day ever when you find out your friends have gotten to leave the NICU as well. It is also the best to know that some become friends for life. I know other families come in when we leave, and I will always be there for those families that need someone to talk to. Live each day like it is your best even when it is hard and you too will make it through your NICU journey.
Read MoreI learned to let go of any preconceived notions and listen to and respond to my own son’s needs. Because while our relationship might have been a little different from others, it was ours and it was special. And we got through it together.
Read MoreNormal pregnancy…Normal infant…Normal Newborn…What is Normal? I thought my 31-weeker is pretty darn normal. Her birth was perfectly imperfect and it was meant for us. It was meant for us to build a strong foundation and relationship.
Read MoreAs soon as my sister’s milk came in- the first thing she did after feeding her own child was to pump for mine. She fed my child when I couldn’t. For anyone who has ever pumped, you know what a sacrifice that is. For anyone who has ever pumped and taken care of three children, you know that it’s practically impossible. It’s a truly selfless act.
Read MoreI meet other NICU parents and no matter what path our children or lives have taken, we just get each other. We lift each other up like family, even when we might be strangers. In fact, I am reticent to even use that word- strangers- when talking about other NICU parents, because there is no such thing.
Read MoreYou give me a few minutes to catch my breath… and wait until I find my way back.
You wait for me when I need it the most.
You wait for me without asking.
You wait for me with the most love in your heart.
And I am forever grateful.
Read MoreMy favorite part of the day besides holding my daughter, was feeding her a swab of my milk. The rest of it was delivered directly to her stomach through a tube down her throat- but those drops that I slaved away for, day and night- those drops that I got to feed her, made it worth it. To watch her enjoy and savor the only thing that I could really DO for her, made it all worth it.
Read MoreWhen I first saw her, I cried. I sobbed. I felt so guilty. I did everything I was supposed to do for a healthy pregnancy but I still failed. My body failed her. Because of me, she was exposed to the world way too soon. I saw her tiny, frail body and was afraid to touch her. The nurse encouraged me to reach in and touch her hand. When I did, her little fingers gripped my finger. It was if she was comforting me. Telling me that she’s a fighter and everything will work out.
Read MoreI wanted to run, to scream, to cry, I wanted to fight everyone. Instead all I could do was numbly watch my tiny baby in her isolette, struggling to survive. I simultaneously wanted to smash everything in sight and sink into a hole in the ground.
Read MoreThis journey has brought us to this beautiful new place in our lives that would have never existed. I have met the most amazing people; the ones who saved my son’s life, and also special ones who saved mine.
Read MoreHaving a sick kid takes practice. It will change you as individuals and change most of the relationships in your life. Like always, that change can be painful, but believe me when I tell you that it’s almost always necessary.
