Bravery from a Preemie's Perspective

What NICU bravery means to me: My NICU journey began on my birthday, October 30, 1986. My mom had an unknown hole in the placenta. At 5 months, she wasn't aware that she was carrying twins. I was the strongest of the two and sadly my mom miscarried my twin. So, she had mixed emotions. Right after I was born via C-section, I weighed in at 1 lb. 8oz. with a 14% chance of living, as a micro-preemie. I was then immediately rushed to the NICU, as my mom was still under anesthesia not able to hold me.

Instead of going home with my parents like with full-term babies, my first home was the NICU. My skin was gray, paper thin and at times translucent, where you could see my organs, I was so sick. At one point, I was the sickest baby in the whole hospital.

I was diagnosed with the following diseases and infections: BPD, PDA, suffered through NEC 3 times, collapsed lungs 44 times, ROP/RLF and survived it as the disease fixed itself. I had numerous heel sticks, O2 stats stuck into me at every chance the nurses got Tape and medical tubes all around my minuscule body keeping my still body alive. As I was recovering, I had an IV that was located in my right thigh and got infiltrated and infected. A blood clot then traveled through my body and landed on my left foot, leaving me to have gangrene. The gangrene had caused me to lose all of my left toes. There were a few times, I would be quite close to not making it. There would be times where I would be dying as death would almost greet me. But, I would perk up somehow in my isolette and survive, leaving the NICU nurses, doctors and parents in total shock!! Doctors also told my parents that 'don't expect much from this child', as I was supposed to be blind, in a vegetative state, locked in some institute with no life. My stay in the NICU lasted for 212 days.

Here I am, a survivor, warrior, and healthy as an adult, who's disabled with some mild handicapped issues, able to walk freely, drive a car alone, and take care of myself.

At almost 37, I'm not afraid to share my story but in fact I'm proud to tell it. I've written my memoir, and I'm just about finished. My book is coming from the preemie's point of view, instead of the parents. I've gone through so much when I was in that NICU for 212 days and as a child with multiple Dr.'s appointments, not really having a childhood. I want to help today's preemie parents on what happened back then, when there wasn't anything. There wasn't high tech medical equipment like there is today. There weren't any cell phones, no support groups, no care packages, no apps. There was nothing for preemie parents like there is today.” NICU Graduate, Christine