I gave birth to my Hero!

“25 yrs ago, I was pregnant for the fourth time. Pregnancy was not my forte as my body liked to rebel against foreign bodies and the organs I was born with. I was diagnosed with Lupus just after I had our tiny undercooked bambino. My pregnancy was awful from day 1. I threw up better than Linda Blair from The Exorcist. I was hospitalized a few times in the first 24 weeks. At 26 weeks I couldn't work anymore, at 27 weeks, things got a little scary. I awoke on a Monday morning with a headache so stupefying i couldn't see well. I carefully made my way to my local ER. Who knew this would be the last time I'd see my dog and home for almost 5 weeks?. I started off at our local hospital and due to March break skelton staff and my hospital not being a level 4 NICU in Etobicoke, On we were transferred to St Joes in London, On. Thankfully, my parents lived there. I remember my incredibly handsome Ob hugging me with tears in his eyes saying how sorry he was that this was happening. He sent his fav nurse with me in the ambulance that was supposed to be in the air but the winter weather was to bad to fly. My hubby had to follow the ambulance down the 401 in a snowstorm while i tried to stay alive. That must have been so frightening for him. When we arrived in London, My bp was 240/190 and caused a lot of medical folks to swear, yell and fret around me while they tried to get my bp from blowing off my head. It worked and i was told to rest, close my legs, behave and put up with my incarnation in the big H for the long haul. I seriously could not fathom being held hostage for 12 more weeks. I was not a happy camper. However, I really did try to behave but my bp had other plans. The docs decided they couldn't risk labour and delivery to cause my bp to rise yet again and an emergency c section was ordered. My mom and sister were nervously laughing and crying , my hubby was sliding down the wall in fear and the only person left to be with me was my beloved daddy. He got the scrubs on and just as he reached the door, I went into distress and the door was slammed in his face. I had to do it alone. After my baby was delivered, she went to the NICU and I went into a coma for 2 days. When I woke up, my sister wheeled me into the NICU to meet my 2lb baby. It was a wild ride back then. On that day that I met her, a tiny tiny doctor was drawing circles on the white board... We later learnt each circle was another heart defect. There were 7 in total. If our little one had been born full term, she may not have made it because her PDA would have closed. As she was born at 28 weeks, It stayed open until she had her open heart surgery at 16 months. While in the NICU,
Hailey had a level 3 gastric bled, grade 4 brain bleed, ROP, reflux (side note, my baby also could projectile barf better than the Exorcist, lol). We stayed in London for 6 weeks and then were transferred back to Etobicoke. Our NICU residency was a total of 61 days. They had hoped she would be well enough to go home for Mother's Day, but sadly that was not to be. To this day, Mother's day still makes my heart sting a tiny bit. No idea why . When she came home her reflux got worse. It would take her 1.5 hours to drink from those grad-u-feed preemie bottles. Or so we though. When we tipped the bottle back up, I don't know how often we would cry to see that she only drank a little bit and followed by throwing it back up. We fed her all day long until she was almost 10 months. So many 2 steps forward and 1 step back. I grew to hate that statement. That and the dreaded adjusted age chart , I hated it all. The day the Physical Therapist said our baby had CP, it took all I had not to punch the poor woman. Another diagnosis to add to the long laundry list. I stayed home with our girl for the first year and we hired a live in Nanny when I returned to work. In order to maintain my benefits to pay for all the medication, physical therapy and aids we needed, I had to go back to my desk. Then before we knew it, we started preparing for our baby's open heart surgery. I remember standing at my desk at work when we got the call that it was time. I almost fainted. My body really has an over exaggerated reaction to sad news. Handing your baby over to the surgeons is a very surreal experience. We waited the afternoon away as we watched docs come tell other parents their news. Some got great news, others didn't. When our surgeon came out and directed us to the quiet room, I don't think any of our family with us breathed for that min and 30 secs. When we exited smiling, there wasn't a dry eye around. Even the surgeon was crying happy tears. For the first time, my blue baby born too early with the most angelic face was now pink. She now wears her scar with pride and even tattooed the bottom of it.
Our girl's CP was managed with lots of therapy and now you only notice it when she is tired. It did cause her to be more clumsy growing up that netted her 4 concussions. Even with all of that and missing weeks of school, our brainiac daughter graduated highschool with the 3rd highest mark in her graduating class. Hailey went on to University and just last week wrote her final undergrad exam that she earned a 95% on. Hailey is the most resilient young woman I know. She fought to stay alive, she endured painful procedures and too many doctor appts to count and she soared. Sadly she lost her daddy a few weeks before her 16th bday. To help strengthen herself, our bunny became certified in yoga and group fitness. This year is a big one, not only did Hailey graduate with honours, she is getting married next month to a man worthy of her heart (we absolutely adore him) and she is starting her Masters in the fall in Dietetics. Hailey had applied to 4 places and received offers from them all. One of them being Sick Kids Hospital where they did her open heart. At Sick Kids, they interviewed 50 candidates and only offered 4 placements and our powerhouse offspring was one of them. Life truly has not been easy for my beautiful girl but it has been full of love, success and experiences. Hailey now has to make friends with a pig or a cow and reallocate their mitral valve. Hers is not doing it's job very well and an electronic one would tick too loud due to her small size. Plus her patches on the holes on her heart have long expired. My baby girl who was evicted too early is the poster child for not giving up. I gave birth to my hero.” NICU Mama, Tammy