He Was Meant To Be

I always say Gio just wanted to keep us on our toes even before he was born and oh how he did! After numerous Dr office vists, ultrasounds and even a few ER visits he continually kept checking out perfectly. We finally had made it again to a time where things were settling down and we could again take a breath and enjoy this experience that we had the honor of being blessed with.

I had just entered the third trimester and at 29 wks1d everything would change. Before I could wrap my head around what was going on it feels like I blinked and I was being admitted because my water had broken at home.

So many questions and thoughts ran through my head from how did this happen, why did it happen to worrying about how our toddler would handle the news that mommy was not coming home for a little while.

I guess in a way it didn't hit me until the NICU team came and had spoken with my husband and I and they took us on the tour of the NICU that everything started to feel real…

Our reality was setting in and I realized why some of the questions I had did not have the answers I wanted to hear....

I learned from that moment we probably wouldn't be getting clear cut answers because really there were no clear cut answers in situations like this.

Every pregnancy is different, every delivery is different and every baby is different and hypothetical answers would do us no good what so ever.

I knew this in my head and by me being a nurse myself I should have known better.

I remember repeatedly telling the staff I had taken my nursing cap off the second I was admitted. I was just a worried, scared and overprotective mom who wanted to do everything and anything possible to help her child make it through the future unknowns. I then came to the conclusion that this whole journey was out of my control and that patience was absolute key to getting through this…

Gio arrived after 10 days of me being admitted at 30 wks4d via emergency c section.

He immediately filled that OR with his crying and I remember looking up at my husband and taking the biggest, deepest breath.

It wasnt until that second that we knew in our hearts that he would be ok, he was meant to be here and he was meant to complete our family. We briefly saw him and then he was whisked away to the NICU where we would call our second home for 40 long days.

We were finally able to see our little miracle shortly after he was all settled in. When I reached into his isolette and he grabbed my finger the feelings I felt after hearing him cry in the OR were validated. He was meant to be, the journey we had just embarked on was meant to be experienced and the final outcome of him coming home happy and healthy will be just that.

Thankfully our stay was uneventful to say the least and Gio just had some growing and learning to do. We experienced many firsts while in the NICU that with the help of everyone that cared for Gio were made extra special.

Not only did Gio grow and learn while in the NICU but we all did mentally, spiritually and emotionally.

Looking back now months later it is so hard to believe that we really went through the journey and we lived the "NICU Life". Not everyday was easy and there were many tears shed throughout the way but my faith, husband, family and NICU staff all carried me through it all and to them I will forever be grateful.

-Preemie Mama Kirasoula

Jen MaherComment